Author: Aging Wisdom
Once you get beyond the sentimental value of your belongings, you are still up against the logistics of how to get things out of your nest. Some stuff is easier to pass along to family than other stuff. Options for what’s left over: Sell, donate, or just “get rid of it!”
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Change is the only constant. And as we enter our later years, it seems the changes are more frequent. Before writing Life Is in the Transitions, Bruce Feiler interviewed 225 individuals to gain a sense of the ways people navigate disruption across the lifespan. He found that we experience roughly thirty-six transitions in a lifetime, averaging one every twelve to eighteen months. Often several pile up at once, especially when we are older. Common transitions for older adults include a shift in health or ability, a marital change (death or divorce), a new housing situation, or a drop in expected income. …
The most common reason to move in later years is to be closer to children and grandchildren. Regardless of your reason for relocating, unless you plan to live with family, there will be many hours of the day when you are just plain newbies in town. How will you spend your time?
If proximity to younger kin is compelling your thoughts, clarify the role you want to play and see if it’s a shared vision. If you have hopes they will help as you get older, be sure to discuss that, as well as any childcare expectations they may have. Also think through if they need to relocate (e.g., job transfer), what will you do then? …
Ask anyone for advice about living a long, healthy life and you’ll probably hear tips about the importance of eating well, stopping smoking, exercising, and getting regular medical checkups. Don’t throw those good habits out the window; but, it may come as a shock to learn that connecting with others may be the single most important ingredient for aging well. …
It is probably one of the toughest conversations you’ll ever have: you would rather talk about finances and death with your parents than ask them to retire the car keys.
Why is it so hard? Americans prize self-sufficiency. Driving is deeply connected to our sense of independence and freedom. On the practical side: without a car, your parents will have trouble getting places. Opportunities to socialize will be tricky too.
Though an emotionally charged topic, it’s counterproductive to postpone tough conversations. Keep in mind, it’s more important to avoid accidents or death than to avoid talking about unpleasant and difficult topics. …
When an adult child asks for money, it’s hard to say no. You want to respond to a need. But perhaps your child perceives that you don’t need all you have, or that they’re simply requesting some of their inheritance, just a bit early.
Before you answer, ask for time to think it over. You want to make a decision based on wisdom, not emotion. You also need time to discuss this with your spouse, if you have one. …
You probably already have some “smart” features in your home.
For instance, a thermostat you can program for a higher temp during the day and lower at night. Perhaps it has remote capabilities, so you can make changes from afar.
Or sensors, such as garden sprinklers that shut off when it’s raining, or outdoor lights with motion detectors. …
As we age, we find ourselves requiring different types of help. Medical needs are typically covered by Medicare. But many of us come to need assistance that is nonmedical in nature (e.g., help bathing or dressing). We have to be prepared to pay for this kind of assistance out of pocket, on our own. If you served in the armed forces, Uncle Sam may have resources to help. …
Cohousing is like a retirement community in that it is a group of residents in individual, private domiciles. Plus, there are shared facilities for group activities. What’s different is that retirement communities are created and run by a developer.
Cohousing communities are created by the people who will live in the buildings. All members hold an equal investment—personal and financial—in the process of creating and running the community. Decision making is shared and is usually by consensus. …
This article was first published July 15, 2022 and updated October 27, 2022
The Midterm elections are just around the corner. The Washington State Voters’ Pamphlet arrived in mailboxes last week. Ballots were mailed October 21. Election Day is Tuesday, November 8, 2022. For information about elections in Washington State, visit the Washington State Secretary of State website page HERE.
Whenever an opportunity to vote is on the horizon, our team often fields questions from family members and other supports about voting when the person in our mutual care is living with a cognitive impairment. …
The Right to Vote and Cognitive Impairment (updated)Read More »